Melnic the Loud

Alias Disgusting Bard

(uses pre-Unearthed-Arcana 1st Edition rules)

Character class: Bard
Experience Level: 23rd
Former level as a fighter: 7th
Former level as a thief: 8th
Secondary skill: nothing
Race: Human
Alignment: chaotic-neutral
Patron Deity: the sycamore tree
Religion: druidism
Place of origin: Central Earth
Birth date: 22 years before the IUDC
Sex: M
Height: 6'0"
Weight: 172 lbs, not including equipment
Place of residence: His own bard college, which is a 300,000 g.p. stronghold.  Or maybe the small keep from the Deck of Many Things.
City of residence: Unknown, but sure as heck not Town

Base movement base: 12"
Movement base with boots of speed: 24"
Movement base adjustments: x2.5 from permanent potion of speed at 150% effectiveness.
Movement base after adjustments: 60"

Character Abilities
Strength: 18/97, 25 with girdle of titan strength
Intelligence: 18
Wisdom: 19 (raised from 18 by I:A)
Dexterity: 19
Constitution: 18
Charisma: 18

Saving Throws

Immunities: (source)

  • all forms of mental or psionic attack (V:EE)
  • all forms of cold (V:FF)
  • magic missiles (I:TT)
  • charm and hold spells (I:SS)
  • fire/heat to all within a 20' radius (V:DD)
  • disease (I:CC)
  • cause fear, charm person, command, friends, & hypnotism spells (19 wisdom)

    Languages: common, chaotic neutral, druid, thieves' cant,

    Attack strength without adjustments: 174
    Defense strength without adjustments: 174
    Adjustments to psionic strength:

  • +40 psionic strength points from helm of telepathy
  • +50 psionic strength points from the 5 dull gray ioun stones
    Total attack strength: 264
    Total defense strength: 264
    Attack modes: all
    Defense modes: F, G, J
    +4 with psionic attacks, due to helm of telepathy
    Major disciplines: ALL
    Minor disciplines: ALL

    Weapons of proficiency: 12
    Non-proficiency penalty: -2
    Chosen weapons of proficiency: bastard sword, sling, javelin, staff, dart, club, scimitar, spear, maul, broad sword, long sword, short sword.
    NOTE: Melnic the Loud was around before the Unearthed Arcana had been published.  Weapons specialization was not available at that time.

    Armor worn: chain mail
    Base Armor Class: 5
    Armor Class adjustment due to dexterity: +5
    Armor Class adjustments due to magic:

  • +5 from cloak of protection
  • +4 from ring of protection
  • +5 from chain mail's plus
  • +3 from permanent potion of invulnerability at 150% effectiveness
  • +2 from boots of speed (not factored in below)
    Total Armor Class adjustment due to magic: +17
    Rear Armor Class: -10
    Armor Class: -20
    To-hit adjustments: +4 with missiles from dexterity, +7 in melee from strength.
    Damage adjustments: +14 from strength, +2 from II:UU; total: +16.
    Hit point adjustment due to constitution: +4 per level as fighter, +2 per level as thief and bard
    Hit die type: d6
    Hit points: 177
    Special adjustments: regenerate 1 h.p. per turn, or 1/2 melee damage inflicted.
    Dexterity adjustment for surprise: +4
    Base attacks per round with a melee weapon: 3/2 (1 in off-hand)
    Attacks per round adjustments: x2.5 from permanent potion of speed at 150% effectiveness.

    Total wealth as coins/gems: 543,803 g.p.
    Experience points: 3,030,698

    Permanent spells: comprehend langauges, detect evil, detect good, detect invisibility, detect magic, infravision, protection from evil, protection from good, protection from normal missiles, read magic, tongues, and unseen servant.

    Permanent potions: all animal control#, clairaudience#, clairvoyance#, evil dragon control#, good dragon control#, ESP#, flying#, invulnerability#, levitation#, oil of slipperiness, philter of persuasiveness#, plant control#, polymorph (self), speed#, treasure finding#, and water breathing.
    (# = at 150% effectiveness)

    Spells Memorized by level
    CLASS casting level 1st2nd3rd4th5th
    druidic13th8 767 5

    Melnic the Loud's Items

    Magic Weapons: +5 defender bastard sword, vorpal weapon bastard sword, 3 +2 javelins, 20 +3 darts, broadsword of sharpness, longsword of wounding, short sword of life stealing, bastard sword of dancing, +5 dagger, 10 javelins of lightning, 10 javelins of piercing, +5 club, +3/+6 frost brand scimitar, 5 +3 spears, +1 luck blade longsword (5 wishes), +2 maul of the titans, sling of seeking, staff of striking (24 charges).


    The Recorder of Ye'Cind:
    Artifact Powers and Effects: entry description
    Table I: Minor benign powers:  S Fly when held and ordered — 1 time/day
     E Clairaudience (when touched to the ear)
    FF Possessor need neither eat nor drink for up to 1 week
    TT Wearer immune to magic missiles
    HHRemove fear by touch
    Table II: Major benign powers:  F Charm person — 7 times/week
    AA Lightning bolt (9-12 dice) — 2 times/day
    Table III: Minor malevolent effects:  D Deafness for 1-4 turns when first used against an enemy
    Table IV: Major malevolent effects: AA User receives 2-20 hit points of damage
    Table V: Prime powers:  O Polymorph any object — 1 time/day
    Table VI: Side effects:  L Limited omniscience: ask DM 1 question per game day

    The Machine of Lum the Mad:
    Artifact Powers and Effects: entry description
    Table I: Minor benign powers: GG x3 Protection +2 when held or worn each, total +6
    OOUltravision when held or worn
     F Clairvoyance (when touched to the eyes)
     UInfravision when held or worn
    FF Possessor need neither eat nor drink for up to 1 week
     ZMind blank — 3 times/day
    SS Wearer immune to charm or hold spells
    CCPossessor immune to disease
     I Create food and water — 1 time/day
    BBPass without trace — 1 time/day
     A Adds 1 point to possessor's major attribute
     LDetect charm — 3 times/day
    VVWizard lock — 7 times/week
    Table II: Major benign powers: RR Wall of fire — 2 times/day
    JJSpeak with monster — 2 times/day
    VVWind walk — 1 time/day
    MM Telekinesis (1,000-6,000 g.p. weight) — 2 times/day
     PEmotion — 2 times/day
    WWWizard eye — 2 times/day
    QQTurn wood — 1 time/day
     TFire shield — 2 times/day
     A Animal summoning (II or III) — 2 times/day
    UUWeapon damage is +2 hit points
    YYX-ray vision — 2 times/day
     G Cone of cold (9-12 dice) — 2 times/day
     YHold monster — 1 time/day
    AA Lightning bolt (9-12 dice) — 2 times/day
    FFPolymorph self — 7 times/week
    Table III: Minor malevolent effects:  C Body odor noticeable at 10' distance
     W Yearning for item forces possessor to never be away from it for more than 1 day if at all possible
     KSaving throws versus magic are at -1
     HPossessor loses interest in sex
     SUser's sex changes
     VWeight loss of 5-30 pounds
     R User must eat and drink 6 times the normal amount due to the item's drain upon him or her
     UWeight gain of 10-40 pounds
     IPossessor has satyriasis
     LSaving throws versus poison are at -2
    Table IV: Major malevolent effects:  F Item is a prison for a powerful being; and there is a 1%-4% cumulative chance per usage that it will break free, kill the possessor's soul, and, using his or her body, proceed to slay all associates and henchmen of this character
     MLose 1 point from hit points permanently
     JLose 1 point of charisma permanently
    DD User shrinks ¼' each time primary power is used
    GG Utterance of a spell causes complete loss of voice for 1 day
    CC User required to slay a certain type of creature to activate item, and slaying another type will deactivate item
    FF User withers and ages 3-30 years each time the primary power is used, eventually turning the possessor into a deathless withered zombie guardian of the item
     V User becomes berserk and attacks creatures within 20' randomly (check each round) for 5-20 rounds
    HH Yearning to be worshipped is uncontrollable; those failing to bow and scrape to the artifact's possessor will be subject to instant attack
    BBUser receives 5-30 hit points damage
    Table V: Prime powers: HH(3) Cast 3rd and 4th level spells simultaneously
     J Magical resistance of 50%-75% for possessor upon command word — 1 time/day
    DD Total fire/heat resistance for all creatures within 20' of the item
     C Bones/exoskeleton/cartilage of opponent turned to jelly — 1 time/day
    FFTotal immunity from all forms of cold
     B All of possessor's ability totals raised to 18 each upon pronouncement of a command word
    EE Total immunity from all forms of mental and psionic attacks
     SRestoration — 1 time/day
    KKWish — 1 time/day
     P Power word blind/kill/stun — 1 time/day
    JJVision — 1 time/day
     F Death ray equal to a finger of death with no saving throw — 1 time/day
    BB The item enables the possessor to legend lore, commune, or contact higher plane (7th-10th) — 1 time/week
     H Gate spell power, 100% effective — 1 time/day
     X Summon 1 of each type of elemental, 16 hit dice each, no need for control — 1 time/week
    Table VI: Side effects:  G Treasure within a 5' radius of mineral nature (metal or gems) of non-magical type is reduced by 20%-80% as the item is consumes it to sustain its power
     C Fear reaction possible in any creature within 20' of the item whenever a major or primary power is used; all, including possessor, must save versus magic or flee in panic
     O Whenever the major or prime power of the item is used, temperature within a 6" radius is lowered 20°-80° F. for 2-12 turns (moves with item)
     P Whenever the prime power is used the possessor must save versus magic or lose 1 level of experience
     I User becomes fantastically strong (18/00 — 19 if 18/00 already) but very clumsy; so dexterity is reduced by as many points as strength was increased, and so no "to hit" bonuses are allowed for strength, and a -2 for clumsiness is given instead; furthermore, the individual must be checked as if he or she has a fumble spell cast upon him or her whenever any item is handled or spell is to be cast by the user

    Other Magic Items:

    Ollamh harp                        +5 chain mail
    scarab of protection               helm of brilliance
    cube of force (36 charges)         healing water
    +4/+2 ring of protection           pipes of the sewers
    horn of blasting                   lyre of building
    drums of panic                     girdle of titan strength
    carpet of flying (36")             reverse eyes of petrification
    ring of feather falling            hole of portability
    boots of speed                     necklace of all prayer beads
    book of infinite spells            necklace of missiles (1,2,2,2,2)
    helm of telepathy                  periapt of proof against poison +4
    stone of good luck                 robe of scintillating colors
    saw of mighty cutting              medallion of ESP with empathy
    gauntlets of dexterity (DONE)      ring of regeneration
    ring of 7 wishes                   vampiric ring of regeneration
    scroll of cure light wounds        scroll of protection from undead
    5 dull gray ioun stones            +5 cloak of protection
    amulet of proof against detection and location

    Mundane Items:

    22 sling bullets in pouch          warship
    wine skin                          large galley
    iron rations                       300,000 g.p. stronghold
    helmet                             small keep
    leather backpack                   5 flasks of oil
    bullseye lantern                   hooded lantern
    1 vial of holy water               tinder box
    42 darts                           wolvesbane
    belladonna                         garlic

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